Snowbservations, Random Order


We’re socked in in the Northeast, 7+ feet of snow in three weeks. I have no idea what the back of my house looks like. My pool cover, advertised as strong enough to hold an elephant, appears not strong enough to hold all this snow. Tempers are short. Snow banks are tall.

Here are some things that I’ve observed from my vantage point, while driving around town feeling like I’m inside a ginormous come of vanilla soft serve:

1) I’ve said this before but it bears repeating. Four-wheel DRIVE does not equal four-wheel STOP. If you’re up my ass and hit a patch of ice it doesn’t matter squat whether you have rear-wheel or 100-wheel drive. So back off. And slow down.

2) Having a plow on the front of your truck does not provide immunity from following basic traffic rules and regulations.

3) Chances are that you had to inch out from behind a ginormous snowbank at some point today. Keep that in mind when you choose between leaning on the horn and giving me the finger me or stopping and cutting me a break while I’m trying to inch out from behind one of my own.

4) If you live in or are on vacation somewhere warm, I’m very happy for you. I don’t need to see pictures of your good time right now. I’ll like them all when you do post them, just please keep them to yourself until August or so.

5) Brush the snow off of your effing car.

6) If your life circumstances compel you to drive on a major highway with an oversized mattress tied to the roof of your undersized car, think about using your hazards and popping over to the right lane.

7) Pedestrians. Walking in the road. Wearing black. At night. Headphones on. Heads down, texting. Hello? And WTF?

8) Good manners are always in style. Do unto others. Don’t be an a$$hole. Stuff like that. Stick to the basics.

9) We’re all in the same boat, or rather we’re all on the same toboggan. So when someone asks how you are or whatever, don’t state the obvious. It’s snowy for everyone. Cold for everyone. Bad driving. Etc. Etc. Etc. Try “Great, thanks” and smile. Actually feels good.

10) If you are driving and must drop off or pick up a passenger, please do not do so in the middle of an intersection…especially if the light is green.

Straight temperature are single digits, wind chills below zero. Ice everywhere. It would be so easy to be miserable.


…I have a choice.

The days are getting longer. It’s light well after 5pm.

The roads are a mess, so running outside is out of the questions; I joined a gym.

And I’m choosing to focus on the pretty. Like this:


I leave you with Walt Whitman:

“Happiness, not in another place, but this place…not for another hour, but for this hour.

Find the happy, in this place, in this hour.


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